He stopped speaking to me and cut off all contact. Whether you have detected the reason for the refusal or not, try to give your child the space and time that they obviously need. Each state has different laws from other states. However, there's not a lot of tolerance when a child exercises that willpower by refusing visitation. Discussion Starter • #1 • Dec 28, 2012. Q: My ex refuses to return child to me at drop off point if I don't speak with him, alone just the two of us. Write a letter. Have your attorney send a letter to your ex. My ex refuses to let me talk to my children when I call them, while they are visiting him for a week in the summer. You were married to a narcissist. Just go it along for awhile and give your ex what he thinks he wants. Close to 20 years now. And if your child refuses to talk to you, don’t refuse to talk to him. Talk to the absent parent. Well, the last few nights ex has been answering and has a few questions for me before allowing the kids to talk. 2. Once the smoke has cleared from a divorce, former spouses have to go about the business of raising kids together. For example, 2 of the kids were sick on 'his' day and he kept them home from school, and never told me either that they were sick or they had been kept home. When you say nasty things about your ex or use your child as a go-between you aren’t getting back at your ex, you’re harming your child. Going to your child’s level almost always results in a fight. I'm not familiar with the terms of the custody order that applies to your family. Letting your ex know upfront what they can do to alleviate your concerns could get your family's visitation schedule back on track. I've been divorced for some years now and we have joint custody of our two boys, ages 10 and 8. My Ex Husband Refuses to Talk to Me, Insists I Talk to His Wife My question involves a child custody case from the State of: Idaho. We are going to be looking at advanced psychological research on ghosting, reputable polls about breakups and drawing on my own experience of coaching people for a living to come up with legitimate reasons for why your ex won’t talk to you.. Oh, and I haven’t even told you about the best part yet. In Washtenaw County we have a system called the Family Wizard to help parents talk civilly about the child. It is hard losing that control over the way you're bringing up your child and the little things in their life like food, clothes, whether they're … I would also suggest you talk to the coach and explain the situation. I know how this feels as it happened with me. They usually then schedule a call with me in a panic because their ex had a negative response to them. Such a MN cliche, but I used to get really pissed off with my ex for giving DS undiluted fruit shoot and ribena at 14 months old! Your ex could take you to court and ask the court to order you to sign the form over to him for this year, but that's a risk for him if he is behind on child support. As a parent you may feel like your hands are tied, especially after a divorce or separation. It doesn't hurt to research good family lawyers even after your divorce is final. In a previous blog post, we explored the meaning of joint custody and reviewed some scenarios in which it would be the appropriate custodial situation for a child. Don’t send it; just get the feelings out there. You should talk to an attorney. You remind her of the ‘bad old days’ and you are a part of a past that she would rather forget. This usually happens when you break no contact too soon. For all this time, you have been trying to get him to respond to you. If it is a major issue that affects your child’s safety, you might say, “Let me talk to dad about how you still need to wear a helmet when you're on your skateboard.” 6. Say for example she is in his care and he gave her medicine but refuses to talk to you so he doesn't speak, or takes her to the hospital during an emergency and doesn't call you. Talk to your ex. Learn more about what to do when a child refuses visitation. (Ex has threatened to shoot me/lies/taking me back to court all the time-etc.) I am repeatedly getting no response to emails, certified mail (won't claim it) regarding summer plans, etc. Do you know how long it has been? If you have trouble respecting anything else about your former spouse, at least respect the fact that they are your child’s parent and treat them accordingly. 'After a few hours of staying at mine, my son says he wants to go home and doesn’t want to stay overnight.' 179 Posts . When you obtain child custody, you have the right to make decisions for your child and you are the legal guardian. Talk to your ex and explain to him how important these games and practices are and see if he might come down for them instead of taking your son to his house all the time. He is obstanate and refuses to talk to me face to face, everything has to be done via email or text. Today we are going to be talking about why your ex refuses to talk to you after a breakup. And now she’s no longer returning my phone calls. Even though you may have a custody and access schedule, a parenting plan, a separation agreement, or court order that says when you spend time with your child, your partner may not let you see your child. Co-parenting with a toxic ex comes with a set of hurdles. I am the custodial parent and he sees them every other weekend and every other Thurs. Reasonable divorced parents are typically able to work out disagreements without resorting to lawyers. Remember, we don’t want to start fights. It can be a stressful experience if your ex refuses to abide custody orders. ASK LINDA, PSYCHOTHERAPIST & CHOICE MOM: My ex-partner and I share joint custody of our 12-year-old son, but now she’s stopping me from having any contact with him. He thinks he can just go through the kids and not have to talk to me about it. Write one every day if you need to. Question: My ex filed an attempt to withhold my two girls. Go with the flow. My ex ( I think under pressure from his new wife) is refusing to communicate about the kids. It may have nothing to do with you at all. And when one starts (it happens, we’re not perfect), we want to get out as quickly as possible. I share legal custody with my ex over our 3 children and have them 60% of the time vs. his 40%. She just left for an (approved) weekend off and the CEO just sent her a text thanking her for putting in her two weeks. Last night I made 40 calls- he refused every time. We’re going to analyze the dumper’s mind and point out the many possible reasons why your ex refuses to talk to you, ignores you, and even blocks you after the breakup. So, what are the options if your ex won’t sign a passport application form for your child? Keep track of all the missed visits and make notes with as much detail as possible. He was the love of my life. I just want to talk to my children. This also gives you certain rights that you can take advantage of if your ex won’t obey the orders. However, this does not invalidate the visitation order, as the court awarded visitation after evaluating the best interests of the child. Talk to your child about their refusal. When they are with me, he does not call them nor does he try and see them extra. After you have exhausted all options (this means trying to talk to them and understand why they are worried, trying to persuade them, and mediation), there are only two things you can do: submit a B-9 form , and if that fails, get a court order. A child under five may appear clingy, cry, scream or pretend to be ill. So instead, I suggest the following: 1. For whatever reasons, your ex husband has chosen not to communicate or seldom shows an interest in talking to you. Many reasons that may include but may not be limited to the following: 1. Major decisions regarding the child’s health, education, and well-being are made together. Company is claiming I put in my two weeks when I never did and refuses to talk to me about it This company is based in Utah, my friend is 24F. Sometimes a child may say they do not want to visit you, the noncustodial parent. I know it hurts when your ex suddenly refuses to communicate with you and directs his or her attention toward something or someone else. Assure the other parent your only motive is to co-parent in a way that is best for the child. This can be very upsetting for your child and very frustrating for you. Additionally, your ex-spouse should not be turning your child against you or trying to get your child to refuse visitation. My problem is that he will not communicate with me at all. Today, we’re going to talk about 11 reasons why your ex won’t talk to you anymore. Joint custody gives both parents full decision-making authority and responsibility in all areas respecting the child. So, in most situations, unless it can be proven that you will pose a risk to, or harm, your child, you will usually be granted some kind of contact. My ex has anger issues and has harassed me for … Parents often lament that children have minds of their own, and there's no doubt that this statement rings true for many families. Okay so me and my ex broke up 3 months ago, we haven’t talked for one month but then it was his birthday so i congratulated him, then we started talking again, we are friends now 2 months after break up, but i still love him and i don’t know if he feels the same, he told me … Since its so late, I have told ex we will have to talk another time- please put the kids on- refuses. And take heart: most cases of visitation refusal are temporary. If he does file and both of you claim the same dependents and he files first, you may be blocked from e-filing. If you don't feel that you can speak openly with your ex about an issue, or it wouldn't be safe to do so, you should formally ask the court to modify your existing child custody agreement. 2. He has access to the children via a court order but refuses to pay maintenance, even though the CSA have taken him to court once already. But you weren't married to a reasonable person. My Ex Won’t Let Me See or Even TALK to My Kid! The senarios go on and on. Older children may become withdrawn, show disinterest or just be blunt and say, 'I don’t want to go'. How Your Narcissistic Ex Really Feels About Child Support. Though I talk about how long you should stay in no contact, many people I speak with break because they believe that contacting their ex will cause something to happen.. Or they fear that their ex has forgotten them during no contact.. Children express resistance to staying with their other parent in different ways. I have seen no paperwork, he will not talk to me, & he hasn't let me talk to my girls. If they won’t talk to you, reaching out will likely cause you more pain and frustration. Your ex may not realize the negative impact they are having on your child—some parents aren’t emotionally intelligent enough to know the importance of their presence in their child’s life. However he is demanding and unflexible and extremely rude. I have been seperated over 2 years and divorced almost 1 year. I don't know why. In a perfect world, they’re able to work together, setting aside their differences and prioritizing the … Every time we agree on a visit, she doesn’t show up. If your child screams at you, don’t scream back. In 2014, the government introduced a presumption that the continued involvement of both parents in a child’s life will best promote that child’s welfare. “My ex-husband doesn’t see his child” The woman's 11-year-old daughter's father would go months without seeing the girl, and instead spent all his time with his new girlfriend. If it is important that the two of you need to talk, your ex will eventually open up. When the mom asked him why he didn't return the daughter's phone calls, he replied: “I don't have anything to say.” If you are making up reasons why you need to talk to them, then perhaps you need to get closure from yourself. A lot of tolerance when a child exercises that willpower by refusing visitation me in a way is! 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